Sunday, 11 March 2012

*insert appropriate title here*

Hello Pixies :D,

I know. I know. I'm not consistent with this blogging thingy. You must probably be thinking I should have just opened a tumblr account or stuck writing to my thoughts on Twitter instead of opening a blogger account. *hangs head in shame*

Anyway, a lot has happened to me in the past 2 weeks. Most of which my memory deemed necessary to temporarily forget (I had nothing to do with it :|). I have learnt a huge amount about the Nigerian Human Specie in the last 2 weeks than I've learnt in my entire 20 years on earth. I've lost friends, made new ones, cooked new meals, done things I never dreamt I could do, procastinated (is this even a word?) more than ever but I'm back feeling all bubbly more than ever :D.

I watched a movie last week, Revolver (Awesome movie which you should totally see if you haven't!) Its kinda old but one of the quotes that I could totally relate to was:

"There is something about yourself that you don't know. Something that you will deny even exists until it's too late to do anything about it. It's the only reason you get up in the morning, the only reason you suffer the shitty boss, the blood, the sweat and the tears. This is because you want people to know how good, attractive, generous, funny, wild and clever you really are. "Fear or revere me, but please think I'm special." We share an addiction. We're approval junkies. We're all in it for the slap on the back and the gold watch. The "hip, hip, hoo-fucking-rah." Look at the clever boy with the badge, polishing his trophy. Shine on, you crazy diamond. Cos we're just monkeys wrapped in suits, begging for the approval of others."

I know a lot of people might not agree with the part about "begging for the approval of others" but as usual, to each his own.

On the brighter side, I had (and I'm still having) a lot of cake this week. Brandy Cake with fruits (which I baked for a friend) and someone who promised me a red wine cake for almost 2 years sent it to me this morning. I'm still excited about it despite the millions of calories I'm gaining and I don't care!! I also read an amazing book "Purple Hibiscus by Chimamanda Adichie". I've never read any of her books apart from 2 of her articles but this is her first novel and for someone's first novel it's really Amazing! I'll probably blog about it later in the week but its a must read!

I also stumbled upon this wonderful poem by Maya Angelou -Still I Rise. It was written in 1978 to describe a black woman who was liberated from her colour in a country where the blacks were inferior to the whites but are slowly equalising racial differences. In my opinion, I think any woman who's being liberated to any problem in life should be able to relate to this poem. Simply written but speaks volumes.
Enjoy. :)

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own backyard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
you may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.
Does my sexiness upset you?
does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.

Have an Amazing week guys.

Monday, 27 February 2012

How early is too early?

"I'm tired of having boyfriends, I wanna get married by December this year either by hook or crook. I don't wanna start having children in my old age!" <----This is what my 22-year old friend was telling me this evening while we were having our constant argument about marrying too early. Ever since I could remember, I've never been a fan of getting married on time and as I grew older, I've only gotten more terrified of the idea. Of course, I admire young couples who actually know what they're doing(or act like they know what they're doing) but this occurs like in 1 out of 10 couples.

As I grew older, what terrified me the most was the fact that I actually thought I was "In Love" with my past boyfriends and always wished for whatever we had to remain permanent. It terrified me to think that I was going to accept feeling the way those 'ex-es' made me feeling simply because I didn't know that there were men who could make me feel so much better. My point is, we are constantly changing and the change occurs most in our late teens and early twenties and its a change you have to ride if you want any shot at finding that special person you'll spend forever with. The reason being that, you have to wait until the person you're going to be, basically forever, has set in. You'll have to wait until you've developed the traits, standards, ideologies you'll be keeping for a while. And that just hasn't happened yet when you're only 22! Oh, I know marrying young has worked for a lot of people but most times, these people were the eldest children in their families, which creates a different kind of dynamic in relationships. But, for a lot of people, marrying in their early 20s is a mistake and most times, they just hang on because of their kids.

Judging from all the people I know that got married too early, here's what scares me the most

Trouble Relating with Friends
One of the huge bonding moments for women is talking about relationships and their dating lives. Telling ridiculous stories of stalking a crush (._. ), complaining about boyfriends that don't pull their weight, crying over heartbreaks, etc. The problem here is that, if I marry really young, my friends will probably stop sharing these tales with me since I have none to share with them and because they'll feel these stories might sound silly to me, hence missing out on the bonding.

Becoming Attached to my Man in the Wrong Way
Three months into my marriage, maybe I'll realize I've made a huge mistake. Maybe I'll realize I could have been in a better relationship, or I could have enjoyed being single longer. But, I missed out (and still missing out) on those days. I get terrified. So, I cling onto my marriage like dear life itself, looking out at the world, shaking. Scared of what I might be without a husband.

Might end up resenting him or my children
It doesn't happen in all couples, but to most young couples: they give up on your dreams a little. Or, a lot. I might postpone applying to a grad school in America or even in Nigeria or turn down that Amazing job just cos I have a baby or my husband won't let me because he says I won't have as much time to cater for the family when in reality its because he can't stand the fact that my salary might be more than his. I find yourself skipping out on the experiences that could have made me grow. I prioritise a relationship at a time when I should have been prioritising my individual growth.

It might be just a few reasons but these reasons scare me more than anything else. In as much as I can't wait to have a lovely family and would want to be submissive to my husband, I don't think at 20 (or 22) I'm quite ready or willing to start a family.

However, there are a lot of people that might disagree with me. Let me emphasise here that these are my opinions based on young marriages I've seen. Heck, if any of my friends decide to seriously get married even at 19, I would give her my blessings and pray it works out well for her. Anyway, to each his own.

Have an Amazing week guys.

P.S. Thanks for all the RTs on twitter, guys. You can also subscribe too. ;)

I need my Space!!!

*brushes cobwebs and dust off blog* *wipes sweat with back of palm*

Hello Pixies :D,

I know for a new blog I haven't posted as much as I'm supposed to. The past week has been pretty crazy and rough for me, but I'm back at least for some time now so please bear with me.

I've had two friends come stay with me for the past week and they've driven me crazy in the past week!! I could swear I've seen 6 different personalities in the past week from just 2 people.
You see, I didn't really grow up surrounded by a lot of girls. I have just one younger sister and since she entered high school 8 years ago, we haven't stayed together for more than one week.

Throughout my stay in the University, I never had a room-mate so its really hard adjusting to this. Its really different when you have a room-mate where you both paid for the apartment so its like you both have equal rights and can make equal amount of decisions. But when you have people stay with you, you can't complain so you won't come off as a nag.
Are simple instructions like "Please if you have to stay till past 11, just stay out" or "Arrange the bed when you wake up" or "Pick up your hair after combing" too much to ask? Its not like I have a large apartment where they'll have their own wing and I won't have to deal with this. I mean I stay in a one-bedroom apartment, please KEEP IT CLEAN!

I can stand a lot of things, but the staying out late and having to stand in front of my building gate till 1am with different men because I won't let people I don't know come inside my apartment is what irks me the most.

I won't say my friends are all bad and inconveniencing. I can't either. That would be wrong. In fact, they are quite wonderful people. I cherish those moments we stay-in, watch movies, cook and gossip. How we talk each other through problems, whisper fun secrets or just the sounds from the keypads of our phones or laptops. I love how we recant old episodes of How I Met Your Mother and Desperate Housewives and try to argue over which character we act like the most.

In general, I think I have the best and worst of both worlds with my friends its just that we all have very strong personalities and we tend to have altercations a lot. However, I need them to move out of my house ASAP! I love them but I need my space!!

Talk later pixies.

Wednesday, 15 February 2012

In the Spirit of Love and 'Burn'

Happy Day-After-Valentine Pixies! :D

So, I was talking with my friend, Valerie last night about putting up a Valentine post but didn't want anything too serious and she said "Just put up something with lots of pictures".... She knows I love pictures so since I didn't have enough on my laptop, I decided to go on Google to check for some and I stumbled upon a Valentine song -Burn and love note Jada Pinkett-Smith put on her Facebook page for her husband, Will.

It is simple, yet so beautiful. Anyway, I thought to share it with you guys.

With the major losses we have experienced in the last few weeks...

We should remember...

Our lives are worth living fully.


Our risks are worthy.
Our mistakes are worthy.
Our traumas are worthy as well.
The very paths we are told not to tread are the paths that hold the keys to our deepest understanding of love for our lives and ourselves.

Self love is the gateway to truly loving another...deeply

We were born to be loved and to love...fiercely.

I love you.
Happy Valentine's Day.
This is for you.

Honestly, I don't think this sounds like a woman who's about to file divorce papers.

You can check the pictures below while listening to the song.

Sunday, 12 February 2012

Whitney Houston: A legend of early Pop and R 'n' B.

I was joking with a friend about how Twitter was unusually quiet as compared to the normal Saturday evening drama when I saw a tweet saying "RIP Whitney!". Almost immediately, I tuned to CNN and as if to confirm my fear it was written boldly, "BREAKING NEWS: Whitney Houston found Dead." I couldn't believe my eyes. Scenes from her movies started flashing through my head. Her perfect white teeth. Her lips which she adorned with almost every shade of red lipstick. That smile. Her quivering lips when she was singing and smiling. She was just 48! I even read a recent article about her, here. So the news was just heartbreaking. :(

I know a lot of you might judge and say "Its just Whitney", "She was a drug addict", "She got what she deserved"  and all sort of side comments but anyone who's heard any song from her Greatest Hits album cannot help but admit that her voice was powerful!

As I write this, I'm listening to the album and I think everyone must have been able to relate to at least one track on that album even . From I Have Nothing when you're trying to convince your lover to not give up on your relationship to You Give Good Love that can be used to show appreciation to your partner or Count on Me to appreciate the value of friendships or even Greatest Love of All that inspires parents and children alike. I remember when my parents just got separated and my father was always listening to I'll Always Love You...My point is everyone can relate to Whitney's songs despite the age or status.

Whitney might not have been able to get her act together especially in the last 20 years but there's no denying that her amazing voice and songs will remain an inspiration to all!

RIP Whitney -Queen of the Power Ballad.

P.S. Below are You-tube videos of my favourite videos of Whitney. Feel free to share your favourite songs in the comments section.


Welcome to Dee's Blog! :D

Yayy!! I finally started my own blog *windecks*

Anyway, I just feel it's cliche to go into why I started this blog...
So, I've always wanted to do some writing ever since I was 9 years old and I kinda rocked at writing essays all through secondary school. ^.^ However, as I wrote my last examination in high school, I sent those dreams to the bottom of my oldest box. Why? I felt I wasn't good enough -___-

Last year, someone tweeted at me and said "when are you gonna start your own blog?" after I helped another someone "advertise" his recent post on his blog and that got me thinking about starting my blog but was still a little scared :|. About a week ago, I wrote something and I sent to one of my friends and she said "You should start your own blog" and I guess that's what pushed me.

What you should expect from this blog?
First of all, its an anonymous blog. Yes, I'm still a little scared.
Secondly, MOST of the stories that would be posted here are very REAL as I don't have the talent for fiction.....yet!
Furthermore, I love food, cooking and really old songs so pardon me when I don't have anything to post here I'll put up a random recipe or lyrics to a song from the 80's or 90's. ^.^
Finally, I love using emoticons or smileys or whatever they're called these days. My favourites include: :D, ^.^, -___- and of course, exclamation marks "!!!!" Please pardon me as I'm excited, nervous and scared about this! X_x

So without further ado, Welcome to Dee's Blog!

P.S. Dee Phoenix is in no way associated to my real name. Dee is from one of the women I admire most -Ruby Dee Ossie Davis and Phoenix is cos I think I have the main feature of the fictional Phoenix Bird (The ability to start afresh) and its also a beautiful name for a female.